Calling all gay moms! As an online community meant to celebrate, love on and build camaraderie around LGBTQ+ parenting, there is one thing we want you to know: there may be those stereotypes out there but, luckily, there are also some tried-and-true ways to live true to who we are and kick those harmful ideas to the curb.
“‘Love takes off the masks we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within.’”
That’s a quote from the brilliant James Baldwin,” says one Family Equality podcast episode featuring a child of an LGBTQ+ parent,
“I think about this often when I consider coming out and identity. Masks provide us with a sense of safety, but there are limitations. I often think about what the cost of hiding is, of what we’re losing by masking parts of ourselves that deserve to be loved and acknowledged.”
After all, at the end of the day, love and family are what matters most. Here are, in our opinion, five must-know simple, yet effective ways for queer moms to ignore the haters and stay proud and confident parents, below.
1. Be visible and proud
It can be as simple as this: be visible and proud of who you are. Live your life and keep your family at the center — by doing so, you are challenging the idea that there is something wrong or shameful about your family — which we know is not the case. LGBTQ+ families are beautiful, strong, loving, wonderful and something to be proud of. Plus, remember that you are not alone (there are many other lesbian mothers out there, like in our community, so join us!)
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2. Seek out community
Speaking of community — finding a supportive community of other lesbian moms can be incredibly empowering and affirming. At Gay Moms Club, we’re all about celebrating and bringing LGBTQ+ moms to find friendship, support and more. Come find the community you’re looking for with us.
3. Admire what makes your family unique
Queer families come in all shapes and sizes, and it will only help you (and your kiddos) to celebrate this diversity together. Show your children that there are many different ways to be a family, and that love, and support are what truly matter. After all, there is no one way to be successful as a parent or in a family, and the world is full of differences all around. Know that what makes your family unique is truly yours to have and hold.
4. Take care of yourself, inside and out
We don’t mean just popping on a face mask and drinking a glass of vino, or hitting the gym every day, either. As an LGBTQ+ mom, you will inevitably face some hard moments — like being the only queer person at the school pick-up line — but if you’re listening to what you need inside and out, it can become a bit easier. Remember that you are a worthy and deserving parent and that taking care of yourself isn’t just good for you, but the rest of your family, too.
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5. Know what you’re worth (because it’s a lot!)
As a lesbian mom, you should know that you have something to give the world that others don’t: a truly valuable perspective on parenting and family life. Own your story and share it with others, because it can help and make an impact toward other LGBTQ+ folks that you might not even realize.